Blips, Whips, Hens & Chips!

Hhhmmmm... you may be wondering where I'm going with this!  I have been on a hen weekend in Amsterdam and have encountered all of the above!! 

Blips...let me count them for there have been many! I promised myself that I would be leading a more alcohol-free lifestyle after the 39th birthday but this weekend soon put a temporary hold on that idea.

As for whips...well it was a hen weekend (I believe their called bachelorette parties in America or chooks in Australia?), so there had to be some kind of kinky thing somewhere!

Hens - there were eight of us in total, and apart from the bride to be's mum, I was the oldest! 

Chips? ... I ate a lot of these over three days to compensate for the immense amounts of alcohol ingested each night! 

If you want more gossip on all of the above then please come back later when I've finished catching up on Work, Washing and Working off the calories at ant aerobic-fest tomorrow night!!  

Indulgence

Its been a few days since my last entry and forgive me dear reader... for boy have I sinned!! That would be sinning in the over eating, over drinking and general over indulgence sense! I know that statistics say it is very hard to get in shape once you get past 40 so now that the count down is officially on, I plan to do it before!! Unfortunately, birthday celebrations aren't generally conducive with cutting back but I always aim to celebrate in style so it was never going to start until the weekend was over anyway!

We had an amazing six course taster menu dinner at the aforementioned swanky hotel, of which four courses were accompanied by a glass of wine, each from a different region! Prior to dinner we had a bottle of Veuve, so the planned retirement to the lounge to partake of coffee and liquors turned out to be a only a brief cup of coffee before admitting defeat and going home! As Small Child was on a sleep over, the thought of nine hours plus uninterrupted sleep was too much to pass up!

So...the new clothes are hanging in the wardrobe, a pair of (very Carrie Bradshaw) shoes that I fell in love with are nestling in their box awaiting their first outing, the Veuve Cliquot bottle has gone to the recycling bank and I am now 39 and counting! Bring it on!!

The Clock is Ticking....

Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday dear "thatgirl"....Happy Birthday to me!!

I know....it's a bit sad to still get over excited about your birthday at the age of 39 but some things will never change! And especially now, as the countdown is truly on until life begins at the F word! 

Just a quick post today as we've just returned home from a mornings birthday shopping (all purchases made in accordance with age this year!!), a lunch accompanied by a glass of red wine and tonight, Other Half and I are off to dinner at the most amazing hotel. We are lucky enough to live close by but it's the kind of place reserved for really special treats! The last time we ate there was Valentines day the year we got married. Am off to unpack and hang up the new purchases and then try and figure out what to wear tonight. So far, 39 is turning out to be a good year...just like my favourite champagne...I feel like La Grande Dame!      

Aerobics With Ants

No I haven't had one too many dandelion detox teas! Whilst trying my hardest to maintain the "plank" position last week in my exercise class, I glanced down at the carpet in an effort to take my mind off the burning pain in my stomach and thigh muscles...and saw ants marching towards me! You would now be right in assuming that I am not a member of some swanky gym full of fit Bunnies and Ladies Who Lunch, although I did used to belong to one when I was single! In an effort to re-start shifting some of the post baby weight, (yes I know..Small Child is now three so it should have come off a long time ago!); I thought I would try a class that is held in the local community hall - funnily enough the same place where I attended a mum & baby group when Small Child was a Very Small Baby!! I wouldn't say the hall is particularly skanky but the ants did make me wonder about how many times I watched all the baby's rolling about on the floor there, no doubt inadvertently consuming a few bugs along the way! Anyhoo, one of the plus points for the class, apart from the free wildlife exhibition, is that compared to some of the other attendees I don't feel either quite so out of shape, out of step...or so odd! On the second row you will find crazy outfit lady who grunts and groans like Monica Seles, right at the back there are two Chatty Cathy dolls who talk throughout the whole thing, (how rude!) and at the front is "best friend of the instructor" who loves to discuss the moves they do at "all the other classes". And then there is me and the two ladies whom I first met through the mums group, all getting redder in the face by the minute and doing our best not to bump into each other during the "mambo" move! We then head off home, congratulating each other on dragging ourselves along for another week as the last thing we feel like doing after working and picking up kids etc is exercising. I then consume a glass or three of red wine and I know for a fact that one of the other two is looking forward to her weekly quota of chocolate! Oh well...it was the thought that counts! P.S. As for the "plank" - don't try it unless you have buns and ab's of steel - I would liken it to a form of torture!

Still A Girl?

I have just realised that there is something of a conflict between my blog title and sign off name! A (really-soon-to-be) 39 year old girl?! Whilst we have all seen a few of these over time..you know the type...mutton dressed as scrag end my grandad used to call it - the two images don't really marry up. Perhaps it's just that this half factual, half fictitious woman still feels the same as she did when she was a girl? Which leads me onto another question - when do you stop being a girl anyway? And I don't mean technically, (I did study human biology!), I mean mentally! I remember being 7 and hero worshipping any girl who was that exciting thing.....a teenager! I couldn't wait to get to my teen years and think I started carrying a handbag when I was about 9! (Eureka moment!! - that's where the accessories obsession stems from!!) Then, when I was about 15, 25 seemed ancient - all 25 year olds must be married with kids and that's where I would be when I got there. Yeah right - more on that much later!! I embraced my 30th birthday as I'd been reading Cosmopolitan magazine for some time by then and knew that every woman should welcome it with open arms and mind. And Cosmo (and my ever optimistic self) were both right, great things happened in my 30's - I bought my own flat, met the right man (eventually!), sold the flat for a profit, got married and had a child. I also refined my shopping skills down to a fine art and have to admit that this is still a work in progress; I am a perfectionist and refuse to stop until I obtain reach new heights of shopping perfection! My last year of my 30's is now speeding towards me at full throttle yet in so many ways I still feel the same as when I was 18! I guess its no bad thing to retain some of the inner child - I wouldn't want to go back there as I much prefer being older and (sometimes) wiser, but I can use it as an excuse for any idiotic behaviour/over excitedness/girly strops etc. The one thing I must remember is to make sure that I don't dress like the ladies my grandad would point out - its all to easy to succombe to the tendancy of wanting to "over ice the cake" when you start to feel your youth slipping away!

People who live in coffee houses...

...shouldn't throw stones! Actually I've never seen anyone throwing stones in the coffee shop that I frequent - they just indulge in harmless activities such as gossip, people watching and reading the newspaper. I practically did live in a coffee house for the last three months of last year and I loved it! Due to aforementioned departure from my job, I had a three month break from work and on the days that Small Child went to nursery, I got to visit my local coffee shop on a very regular basis. Not as regular as those who visited every morning and always managed to lay claim to the best sofa's in the window; they all knew each other and would ensure that one of them was there just before the doors opened to secure their spot. Actually one or two of them were quite loud and annoying, especially the one who moved her dirty cups onto my table!! Her companion (male, old country gent eccentric type) gave me a knowing look as if to say "please excuse her, she does that sort of thing all the time". I just glared at them before going back to my skinny cappuccino, magazine and croissant! (Theory - I am allowed croissants occasionally due to the cappuccino's being skinny! Not an equal balance I know but you don't pass up those croissants!!) Incidentally, something I feel the need to share and feel quite strongly about....you don't have chocolate on cappuccino - the Italians don't do it and neither do I!

I'm proud of the fact that now, when myself or Other Half go in there, the barista knows our order - I've always wanted to go into a coffee shop and say "The usual please"! I've kind of ruined it recently by switching between "the usual" or a skinny latte with an extra shot or a caramel-latte. How much do I love thee oh Caramel-latte!! I know I may as well rub it straight onto my mid-riff, bum and thighs as that's where it ends up, but I DON'T CARE - I LOVE THEM! Small Child has taken a liking to the gingerbread men and weekends now usually consist of a trip to the coffee shop, post weekly supermarket visit, where bribes were issued all the way from the fruit and veg section through to the checkout, stating that "there will be no gingerbread men if you don't get up off the floor now"! Does Super Nanny recommend bribes - I don't think so; but quite frankly until I've had my caffeine fix, I'd rather opt for the quiet life!

New York City Girl

I am not a "native New Yorker" as per the lyrics of that now retro-cool seventies song, but since becoming an avid Friends and then Sex and the City fan, plus one trip of a lifetime later, I can honestly say I am hooked! Holidays of note have not generally included cities but this one gets right to the heart of you and never leaves - I can see why New Yorkers go on about it so much! After taking redundancy from my job of fifteen plus years and receiving a decent pay out, Other Half and I decided we would take ourselves off there for four days, sans Small Child, and do NYC in style! Despite the trauma of only being allowed to take hand luggage due to baggage belt failure and the airport being securely tucked in under a thick blanket of fog, we did take off and only one hour late. We stayed in The Soho Grand Hotel with a room on the 12th floor that provided an amazing view uptown that I could have gazed at the whole four days! Thatgirl's NYC hi-lites?
A mid afternoon cocktail at the Waldorf Astoria.
Purchasing a pair of Louboutin's in Saks Fifth Avenue shoe department that was so big it had it's own zip code!

A helicopter tour of the city, despite my being scared within an inch of my life when they sat me next to the pilot!
Dinner at Gordon Ramsey's restaurant, Maze in The London Hotel - and before going in, pressing my nose against the window of Manolo Blahnik!
Knock down designer shopping in the snow. I can highly recommend buying two Diane Von Furstenberg dresses for less than the price of one when its snowing outside as a great way to keep warm!
Coffee in Central Park (not Perk!)
Using the ladies room in Tiffany's - I only ever pee in the best places!
Starbucks breakfast en-route to the top of the Empire State building.
Walking down 5th Avenue, swinging my Medium Brown Bag and looking up to see the building where Chandler works!
Late lunch at Katz's deli - minus the faked orgasm by Sally Albright!

We were only allowed to leave once Other Half agreed that we could come back when Small Child is not so small, so that she can share the shopping experience; though hers will be more at FAO Schwartz than Bloomingdales I think!

Its all White.

Have you heard of The White Company? If you have looked at their website or leafed through one of their catalogues, you will know why I want to live in White Company World (WCW)! The people who live in WCW have an apartment in the city and a house by the beach. The latter of these two (insanely beautiful) properties will be decorated in the style of a Hampton's home and look like it should be situated somewhere in Martha's Vineyard. All females residing in said property will be beautiful, thin and casually stylish; make-up (for the yummy mummy ones) will be minimal and they will all look like they have just woken up from twelve hours sleep, ALL children will be behaving and looking beautiful whilst wearing simple but adorable white cotton attire and even your laundry accessories will inspire you to get on with the "bloody washing"! Other Half and I say that when we win the lottery we will of course furnish our beach property (and perhaps some of the country residence too) with oodles of WCW stuff.

Meanwhile back in TRW (The Real World), over the last couple of years I have succumbed to the pull of WCW, purchasing a nightdress for me, a candle or two, a hot water bottle cover and some linen spray (yes I know.....what do i do with this except squirt the occasional guest duvet with it and then leave it strategically placed on the side in the spare room!!) But quite frankly...who cares? Having tucked Small Child into bed tonight in her WCW p.j.'s next to her WCW recently purchased bedside cabinet, I do feel it helped to erase the fact that I woke up this morning with panda eyes after drinking too much red wine the night before! Plus, although I weigh far more than those babes in the catalogue and Small Child's behaviour often leaves me pulling out my hair in chunks, by buying into a little piece of airbrushed, muted toned paradise, I too am living the dream...its called escapism don't you know?

Friday Afternoons

Friday afternoons should not be spent in the office...in fact they should be spent anywhere but! I don't do Fridays at work..I mean I used to in my old job, but since starting this one I haven't done them up until now. And its far too quiet today...hence the brain has wandered off again! I work in a small office, (used to work in a large one), with a much smaller salary than the one I had in the large one! The joys of being a working mother know no abounds! Part time work is harder to find than the flat tummy I have lurking beneath my post-child layer and then there is the priority battle that frequently rears up between finishing that important piece of work versus being there for the post bedtime tantrum! And so I find myself thinking of other things I would like to be doing right now instead...top five all time Friday Afternoon Pursuits:


Shopping has to be the all time favourite - in particular the kind of cut price designer shopping myself and Other Half indulged in during a trip to a snow covered New York City recently!


Sitting outside a bar/cafe/restaurant with a drink in hand, magazine in the other, Other Half sat opposite, Small Child (mine) sat next to me behaving impeccably (yeah right!) Alternate version of that would be Small Child staying with Grandparents for the night...which leads onto....


Sleeping!! Never in my life have I appreciated so much the illicit joy of an afternoon nap than since I had Small Child! I don't care whats going on...if theres a chance I can catch up on sleep then I do.. and unlike most mothers, I don't feel guilty about it!!


Watching a movie with the biggest bucket of salted popcorn I can carry with only citrus flavour fruit gums to follow for dessert! The movie would be the upcoming fashion fest that will be Sex And The City! I "heart" Carrie Bradshaw!!


All of the above, one after the other and in no particular order!

Fact or Fiction?

Am I really (soon to be) 39..surely my life hasn't gone that quickly? Due to the fact that I am now married with a daughter, jointly own a home, have lines appearing on my face and feel the need to tell the world about all of this, it must be true! I'm about to embark on my 40th year and feel the need to put down on paper some of the things that fill up my poor aching brain all day! Can you be Yummy and Mummy at the same time? Is there a suburban housewife trapped inside this wannabe fashionista who lives to shop, prefers only to drink champagne, craves an "it" bag and wear expensive shoes? Or do I secretly yearn to be the earth mother whose child is the embodiment of current P.C. behaviour, who can pick and freeze all the vegetables from her allotment yet still manage to look like something out of the Calvin Klein Eternity ad whilst being covered in all manner of toddler goo? Maybe you can be both but one thing is for certain...I will be hitting the big one next year whichever "me" wins out; so perhaps I should just take my selves off to buy some more mothering handbooks and investment pieces of clothing and let the credit card bill decide!